Seriously! Now quit laughing and read on as to the reason I am writing about this.

If you read my post from a week ago, you know we were snowed in and I mentioned how I wore makeup no matter what. I had said I would probably hit publish and go put it on.  BUT-my daughter was sitting here and challenged me to go the whole day without it and see how it made me feel and then to write about it. I begrudgingly took that challenge and I wasn’t even going to write about it, thinking how silly it sounded.  This morning I was thinking about it again, and all kinds of thoughts were rambling around in my head, so I decided it was time to write about it!

Before I get to that, I promised last week when I knew we would bake to write update as to just what we made. Pretzels, sweet cornbread from scratch and pumpkin pie.

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Now that I distracted you with the goodies, back to the subject!

I did make it through the whole day, until the next without putting on any makeup. I threatened to go back and put some on many times.  I kept feeling my face, expecting it to feel soft and clean, but it felt strange to me and actually a little dry.

How did it make me feel? Uncomfortable. A bit ugly. Vulnerable.  Wow. I am thinking how ridiculous it sounds but it is true.  Where do those feelings come from?  They have to have started so long ago.  When you are always the tallest from a young age you tend to already get singled out. Kids can be cruel. I had a nickname I heard so young that I never forgot. Underdog. (I can’t believe I am even sharing that. It makes me feel sad, actually.)  I remember one time just waiting at the junior high to pick up younger siblings, some boys, who I had NO idea were went by and said, “Scofield, you are a horse face.”  (Now I want to cry!) I had/have a sister who was always considered the ‘pretty’ one, always called beautiful.  Hey, I am the nice, sensitive one.  Yeah. That.

So makeup helps.  I do think I have pretty eyes and I like to try to show those off. Maybe it could distract from everything else! Seriously. I do think it has to do a lot with self esteem and a lifetime of the lack of it. Don’t get me wrong.  I am who I am and I kinda like who that is! That wasn’t always the case, though!  I wear makeup to just feel a little better about myself.  To give my otherwise pale complexion some color.

I would love to be one of those people who are comfortable enough or beautiful enough to go without makeup. I sadly, am not! Don’t ask for a picture of me without it to try to argue because you will never get one! Some things a girl has to keep to herself!

How do you feel about going without makeup?  Let me know in the comments!  I am interested in hearing.